Come Back, Barack

Listen while you read:  From SNL!!!

I have a guest writer for today's blog! I'll be back tomorrow. Enjoy!

This time of year, I get thankful, baby
Thankful for you
But now you're gone and I don't know what to do
And you were so intelligent
And you were so strong
Waited my whole life for you
So damn long
And now I see you're moving on
And I'm begging, "Come back home!"

Every night I turn the TV on and cry
I say, "Why?"
I feel like we're all gonna die
So come back, Barack
Even though it's not allowed
We want you back somehow
I need you in my life
Come back, Barack
We didn't know just what we had
Now things are looking bad
Like really bad
Like World War bad
Like nuclear bad

So come back, Barack
I see you hang-glide
Living your life
Dropping your daughter off at college with your wife
And y'all look so damn happy
You deserve it, yeah
But I'm a selfish man
And I know that there's a Democrat
More than just a few
But when I think of change
The change I want is you
I'm in hell
Dreaming about you and Michelle

So come back, Barack
(C'mon, man, I'm in the rain)
Don't leave us here alone
(It's definitely too cold to be rained on)
So please pick up the phone
(I mean, I know you're finished with that library and everything)
The White House ain't a home
(Trump don't even got a dog, man)
Just come back, Barack

(The Speaking Part)
You know it's been a long time, Barack. Almost as long as since a guy talked over a record like this. Why would you leave us? Oh, 'cause you had to? Because of the Constitution? But you can come back, right? Oh, you can't? 'Cause that would undermine the very institutions that we're barely holding onto as it is? I see. I guess we stuck with this dude for a while then. Maybe you can come back and make a speech? How much would that cost? For real? Oh, no, we definitely can't afford that. So I'm just getting rained on for nothing. That's interesting. Well, you enjoy your retirement, homie.

Come back, Barack
(Keep change)
We need you oh so bad
(Super bad)
2020's looking sad
(Maybe Michelle can run?)
Like really sad
Like super sad
Like what-the-hell-we-gonna-do sad
(No, let's not put Michelle through that)
Come back, Barack
(But if she wanted to . . . )
I'd vote for Joe Biden
What about George Clooney?
I mean, that dude was Batman
That'd be cool!

You know what? I don't think the three of us have the firmest grasp on government, but Happy Thanksgiving, everybody!

~  Chance the Rapper with Kenan Thompson and Chris Redd