Bowling Green -- The Kellyanne Version

Listen while you read: https://youtu.be/Vf9jxEBP6ks

If you see my Kellyanne
Just tell her once for me
She could take another job
The truth would set her free
Oh, the truth would set her free
Bowling Green
Oh, you good old Bowling Green

Wish I was a Congressman
A-writin' up a speech
I'd make a bill for refugees
And then vote to impeach
Yes, I'd then vote to impeach
Bowling Green
Oh, you good old Bowling Green

Goin' through this whole wide world
Never stand alone
We'll open up our hearts and hands
And give these folks a home
We will give these folks a home
Bowling Green
Oh, you good old Bowling Green

Do you remember Bowling Green
On that fateful day?
There never was a massacre
No matter what they say

~  Dan Schatz

I spent a semester as a grad student and teacher at Bowling Green State University in 1973.  It was in the fall, when the local Heinz factory produced ketchup.  I had a constant craving for tomato soup.  My understanding was that, in the spring, the factory produced cat food.  I'm glad I moved on and missed that.

But that was an alternative Bowling Green, the one in Ohio. The Bowling Green that's in the news these days is the one in Kentucky, home state of Senate Majority Leader and Resident Turtle Mitch McConnell.  (Sometimes it is SO hard not to be snarky when writing these posts.)  Given that the coverage of the Bowling Green Massacre still has life, I began my day looking for song lyrics about Bowling Green.  Inspired by WFUV (which I stream all day) playing a version of "Bowling Green" by Neko Case & Her Boyfriends, I googled to find that The Everly Brothers recorded that song in 1967.  Written by two of their backup musicians, Terry Slater and Jacqueline Ertel, the song was also recorded by Glen Campbell and by Jesse Winchester, among others.

But that's an alternative song about Bowling Green.  The one that Dan Schatz patterned his satirical version on is titled "Good Old Bowling Green," a standard most notably recorded by The Weavers at Carnegie Hall in 1963.  Prior to that, Cousin Emmy, the nationally acclaimed "banjo-pickin' girl," recorded the song in 1946.  (In a conversation leading up to their performance of the song, Carolina Chocolate Drops lead singer Rhiannon Gibbons claims that Cousin Emmy could play a variety of instruments, including a rubber glove and her cheek.)

But those are alternative recordings of the song.  Let's talk about the Dan Schatz version above.  I came upon this in my google search and discovered that Dan just posted it on his Facebook page two days ago.  (I am a big fan of serendipity!  Thanks, Dan!)  Dan is an acclaimed folksinger / songwriter with an obviously good sense of humor, clearly illustrated in this song.  But the lyrics take a serious turn as Schatz makes the case for an America that truly welcomes "the huddled masses yearning to breathe free."

But that's an alternative interpretation of America.  In case any of my readers do not know about the Bowling Green Massacre, that's because it never happened.  Kellyanne Conway made it up in defense of her boss' Muslim ban.  It is true that there was an FBI sting operation in Bowling Green which culminated in the May 2011 arrest of two Iraqi nationals who, in a failed plot, were attempting to send money, explosives and weapons overseas to al-Qaida.  But there was no massacre, not a single casualty.  It was a successful sting operation.  In her defense, Conway said she meant to say "terrorist," not "massacre."  As stated in yesterday's post, words matter!  "Terrorist" is not an alternative word for "massacre."

Conventional wisdom has now taken on the task of differentiating between falsehoods and lies. In telling a lie, the speaker knows the statement is untrue but says it anyway with the intention of deceiving.  In telling a falsehood, the speaker may not know that the statement is untrue.  Which was it, Kellyanne?  Oh, wait.  I forgot.  It was an alternative fact.